DICTIONARY

Hot Greek Now

A Very Gay Guide to Greek

by Helena Lorenzen

Greek can be a tough nut to crack, what with the non-latin alphabet and our furious manner of speaking. Though you are probably not aware of it, but you already know lots of Greek words, like poly (very, a lot) as in polygamous, theatro, or theatre, and kliniki, as in, yes, clinic.

Let's face it, though; philanthropy and cardiology won't get you very far in the streets of Athens, but the first part of these words file (friend, mate) and kardia mou (my heart, i.e. darling) stand a better chance. And though eros may be too much to expect during your brief stay, an erotiko radevu (erotic rendezvous) should be within your reach. So here's a concise list of the most useful Greek expressions you are likely to need.

Ne = yes

Ohi = no

For those sad occasions when you’ve had your fill.

Isos = maybe

If you haven’t made your mind up yet.

Thes na su psithiriso glikologa sto afti? = Do you want me to whisper sweet nothings in your ear?

Se thelo tora = I want you now.

Just in case your body language skills don’t have the desired effect.

Ti mou kanis? = What are you doing to me?

It’s probably the most commonly used expression between Greeks having sex. It’s not a genuine question, nor does the Greek population have a problem grasping reality while in the throes of passion. It’s just that we love to hear from our lover a blow by blow account of what is happening.

Ti sou kano? = What am I doing to you?

While you are shagging him, ask him just to check his mind hasn’t wandered elsewhere.

Ise (poli) kavliaris = You are (very) hot.

You don’t have to mean it. Make that kavliara, if you are addressing a woman.

Kialo! = More!

Once your lover hits the spot, you’ll want to make sure he / she stays there.

Hino! = I’m coming.

Literally, it means “to pour”. Some of us do.

Parta! = Take it!

“It” being cum. It’s a sort of announcement by your lover that he’s in the process of cumming – usually on you.

Mono me profilaktiko = Only with a condom.

You want to meet hot new men, not horrible new diseases! By the way, you’ll find condoms in all pharmacies and most kiosks.

Ksana = Again!

Because you just can’t get enough.

Stamata! = Stop!

If your lover has talked your ears off or is handling your nipples as if they were alien devices, this is the word you need.

Ai gamisu! = Fuck off!

For the rare occasion when you don’t need another friend.

Thelo na se gamiso = I want to fuck you.

With the right kind of look, it’ll get you there.

Gamise me = Fuck me!

Alternatively, simply get on all fours.

De mas gamas? = Why don’t you fuck us?

But in true fact it means “get lost, I can’t be bothered with you.”

Malaka = Wanker / mate.

A swearword and a term of endearment all in one. It’s probably the commonest Greek word. It’s not wise to use it if you are unsure of the context.

Vromas tzatziki = You stink of tzatziki.

We may eat it, but not before bedding someone.

Pathitikos = No, it doesn’t mean your pathetic, only that you’d rather be passive.

Eneryitikos = You can be as lazy as a doorknob, but in sex this means that you are active.

Energopathitikos = Put them together and you get versatile.

Apaghile mou tin Iliatha = Recite the Iliad to me.

The perfect post-coital line.

Ise o erotas tis zois mou = You are the love of my life.

In case you’re planning to go Shirley Valentine on some Greek soul who was merely hoping for a quick shag.